Some women are just naturally blessed with seriously dangerous curves. We’ve got the boobs and the booty and the confidence to match, because our assets are dead sexy. But no matter how fierce we look and feel, there are some things that just never get easier for curvy girls.
1. Lingerie. Finding cute lingerie is a constant struggle. This rack deserves sexy AND supportive, why does the world insist on giving me nothing but granny bras?
2. Taking the Stairs. Climbing the stairs is actually painful. Please look away while I hang onto my tits.
3. Dating. Being told, “I like a girl who eats,” or “that’s so great you don’t worry about your weight” any time you eat in public. I’m not trying to make a statement, just let me eat this burger in peace.
4. Curvy Girl Side Eye. Being told, “you’re sooooo lucky, I just can’t gain weight.” Um, thanks, I know I look fierce, but that’s just rude.
5. Assigned Seats. Airplanes and movie theaters are the worst. You’re either getting these boobs in your face or this ass in your lap. Your choice.
6. Backless Dresses. If I can’t wear it with a bra, it’s dead to me.
7. The Perfect Fit. Every outfit makes you look like a sex bomb. A plain tee and jeans looks suggestive thanks to your curves. You can either wear clothing that fits and shows off the girls, or you can wear boxy sweaters that add an extra 15 pounds. We prefer the former!
8. Real Talk. When someone asks if your boobs or ass is fake. These are home grown, thanks for asking.
9. Pants. Pants only ever fit one part of your body. If it fits over the booty, it doesn’t fit your waist. If you can wear them without a belt, your thighs are losing circulation. Yoga pants, you are my everything.
10. Online Shopping. Online shopping is impossible. Buying something without trying it on does NOT happen in curveland. The only solution is buying everything in three different sizes to try on and hoping for a decent return policy.